Assume = Ass + u + me

Hello Gentlemen –

We’re 11 days into 2011… hopefully not too late for me to wish you a happy New Year? I really enjoyed 2010, and while 2011 looks like it’s going to be drastically different for me, I still think it’s going to be fun 🙂 Commitments will most likely be  keeping me pretty close to home for most of the remaining winter…  however I *really* really want to try sneaking out to San Francisco again. We’ll see what happens, won’t we?

It’s come to my attention that I really have to pay closer attention to posting my local tour dates. In my mind, my local area is New England so I don’t really think it’s necessary to note whether or not I’m in northern CT or Southern VT. I’m used to rural life for the most part so distances less than 45 miles don’t really strike me as worthy of public announcement, especially since I’ll only be there for a few hours anyway. However, I can appreciate that some of you considerate gentlemen don’t want to take me too far out of my way, and would rather not risk the imposition of inviting me out to the NH Seacoast when I’ve already accepted another engagement out by the casino. It just never really occurred to me since a lot of my time is spent at off the wall places that many of you would probably have to dig up on google (there is a Peru MA, and it is  beautiful), so it’s not like you’ll look up and be thrilled that I’m so close by, lol. Well… maybe one of you might be, every once in a while 🙂

Yes, that really *is* Naomi Campbell

Other things that have come to my attention that I would like to see if you’d like brought to yours – I also seem to have a weird sense of humor. Myself, I find just about everything hilarious (except spilled milk – it’s devastatingly tragic) and occasionally I find that I might even make a joke that you’ll laugh at as well! So, while we’re all laughing, it only just occurred to me that we might be laughing for different reasons…

I’m not making a profound point here, I swear. Really, this all comes to mind because of a conversation I had recently, with a random person who had by chance noticed my site. This man seemed to find the joke in my FAQ about Greece incredibly funny, and focused a good deal of the conversation upon it. While the rest of the conversation rapidly revealed to me that this man and I would probably not make a match for many reasons (if you like carefully maintained manicures, alluringly trashy tattoos, huge hoop earrings and Barbie doll bald pussies, that’s wonderful! However that’s not me, so no point in setting us both up for disappointment), it was hilarious to me that while he thought my quip was witty, he had entirely missed the original intent of it. He had assumed, simply because I asked the same question of my questioner, that I would never imagine ever putting anyone’s eager appendage up my butt, because lord knows no man would ever want anything up *his* butt, right? Of course such a reversal as a response would mean that we’d all have to be *crazy* to enjoy anal sex! Of course I wouldn’t do it. Would you?! I didn’t think so. How clever I am, for finding such a diplomatic way to decline such disgusting propositions.

And if that’s your attitude about anal sex, then you’re absolutely right. Stay the fvck away from my back door, buddy. But for the rest of you who see no reason why an alternate point of entry shouldn’t be a fun and exciting experience that *anyone* can enjoy, I don’t see why not either. It’s wonderful when it’s done right, as I’m sure you can agree. Not sure how to do it right? Well, first consider how you like it done, and then perhaps I can offer a few personal pointers as to how I like it done. Everyone’s different! I have a couple of different strap ons as well…

When someone talks to me about going Greek, I wonder if fraternities are really taking just *anyone* these days?

~Mme X~

Toys, Strap on and a rocking horse! brought to you by PornHub

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2 Responses to “Assume = Ass + u + me”

  1. Bernie Says:


    I love milk!!If I ever had a glass of milk spill then trouble ensued. If your model ever needs a cleanup I’ll be willing to lick it all up – NO CHARGE>
    As for the rocking hourse – ROCK HARD ON!

    You DEVIL YOU>

  2. Bernie Says:


    Am I on your shit list? How cum the rocking horse vidio stopped laying today?


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